I guess I can admit though that there was one interesting blurb in the one of the magazines. The magazine asked (not going to tell you which one because I don't want to promote them), "If money were no object, would you want to have more than 1 or 2 kids?"
First of all, the question struck me as odd as it functioned almost as a statement like: "Only financially responsible people of 1 or 2 children. If you were financially irresponsible, how many kids would you have?" I am of the opinion that money should have very little to do with how many children we should have (if you haven't figured that out yet).
But even more startling than the question itself was the answer: Less than 20% of women said they would indeed stick to 1 or 2 citing that they can't handle too many young children, while a whopping 55% of women said they would have 3-4 children, while 5 or more children took the rest of the pie. It saddens me that so many people choose money over children and that this choice is so culturally accepted today. Whatever happened to the idea that all the child needs is a loving father and mother? I am not trying to negate the effects of poverty on family and that there truly are times to stop having children. But I guarantee you that the people answering these polls in a middle-class pregnancy magazine do not fit the description of living in crippling poverty.
What motivates you from having children or not having them? How much money is not enough money to have children?
1 comment:
I don't use financial status as a barometer for how many children one should/shouldn't have. I think the more appropriate standard is responsibility. Because responsible people will find a way to make things work, no matter how many children and how little money they have. For those people, it shouldn't be about, "can we afford it?" and instead, "can we handle it?" Irresponsible people shouldn't be having children, ideally, but if they do, they should probably not have too many, because their lives will just continue to spiral out of control with the more children they have. This is referring to not just financial responsibility, but all forms of responsibility. They tend to go hand-in-hand.
For us, personally, it was never really a matter of, "can we afford this?" because no matter how much money you have, children will always take a large chunk out of that. We also didn't dwell on the other common question of, "is the timing right?" because the timing will NEVER be perfect. Those are just two things you can't use as a gauge. What we did look at was our health and happiness as a couple (we were solid, and had been for a very long time), and my physical health and well-being (I was at my peak of physical health).
As for us not having more children, it's mostly the fact that I can't (that will typically hinder things), but I think there are other good reasons for people to stop having kids. For example, if the mother and father are having relationship issues, it's not a good time to add another child to the family. If either parent is not doing well, physically or mentally/emotionally, the stress of a child could be too much. If a previous child has a lot of special needs, that could be another reason not to have more children (in fact, this is why my parents stopped at two, my brother was learning delayed). These are just a few I can think of off the top of my head, but none are monetary.
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